Jeff the Killer: Solitary Recollections

Jeff is ready for a night where [[no one is around.]]

After a long week of being annoying, and having a good time doing it, it's time to actually [[get some work done.]]

Jeff sits down at his desk and pulls out his (cycling-link: 2bind $passion, "sketch pad.","skrying mirror.","knife collection.") [[Now it's time to get to work!]]

{(if: $passion is "sketch pad.")[Now he can [[draw]] his favorite things!] (if: $passion is "skrying mirror.")[Now he [[can spy]] on people!] (if: it is "knife collection.")[Now he can reflect on past murders while sharpening his [[collection!]]"]}

"Hehehe..." Jeff giggles because he loves spying on people. He stops giggling, because he's not sure who to spy on... maybe (cycling-link: 2bind $spying, "Masky","BEN","Laughing Jack","The Slenderman","Eyeless Jack")? [[Yup, that's the one.]]

Jeff the killer rubs his chin, wondering what he should draw... (cycling-link: 2bind $drawing, "PONIES!","A ROOMATE!","A MEMORY!") [[THAT'S IT!]]

He gazes upon his collection with much pride, his favorite right now is the (cycling-link: 2bind $favoriteKnife, "butcher's","tomato","carving","boning") knife. [[Time to test the blade.]]

{ (if: $drawing is "PONIES!")[Jeff has a favorite pony, and isn't afraid to admit it. (cycling-link: 2bind $favoritePony, "Fluttershy","Applejack","Twilight","Pinkie Pie","Rarity","Rainbow Dash") for the [[win]].] (if: it is "A ROOMATE!")[Well, Jeff definetly has more than one roomate. It's sort of a communal living situation. (cycling-link: 2bind $favoriteRoomate, "Masky","BEN","Momo","Smile Dog","Eyeless Jack","Nina") is his favorite roomate right now.. [[So, that's who he'll draw now.]]] (if: it is "A MEMORY!")[[Jeff has lots of memories! Lots! Shut up!]] }

Alright, Jeff uses his makeshift magical powers to look through space... {(if: $spying is "Masky")[//Masky does not seem to be doing anything special... just squatting behind a gas station, eating hot chips. He will have to be careful not to get any of that dust on his mask or jacket... Or maybe it's scarier to be followed by a guy slathered in spicy dust. Jeff is more of an ambush killer, honestly...// Jeff considers adding hot chips to his routine.] (if: it is "B.E.N.")[Spying on BEN may have been a bad idea because the scrying mirror seems to have interpreted this command as following BEN's *digital* manifestation (which is pretty much a computer virus) and not observing their effects on any moniter. Jeff is electrucuted by the mirror and it shatters.(set: $mirror to "cracked")] (if: $spying is "Laughing Jack")[Laughing Jack is always a hoot to spy on, by his very nature. He's an actual clown so like... you get it. He's funny, but also kind of sad. Like a sad clown. //Jack is laying face down in a dunk tank. Is he like.... dead? He's just like... floating.// Jeff watches for a few minutes but Jack never shows any sign of moving other than a slow drift as the wind pushes him around. Okay well. That sucked.] (if: it is "The Slenderman")[The mirror shatters into a fine dust, sprinkling across his room like snow. Jeff quickly runs out of his room. Breathing that in feels like a bad idea. Well, Jeff... that's what you get for messing with the arcane... and also not respecting anyone's privacy.(set: $mirror to "broken")] (if: $spying is "Eyeless Jack")[The mirror opens on a dark screen. After a Jeff taps the mirror a few times, it swaps to night vision. OH! Gross. He's eating some fool. It's pretty uncomfortable to watch... Look away, Jeff. Jeff. Jeff, look away. Okay, fine. Jeff closes the view.] }

{ (if: $JeffMemories is "spat gum on the back of Masky's jacket and it stayed there for like a whole day without Masky noticing.")[Jeff has no remorse. <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/21/Theres-the-fucker.png" alt="gum on the jacket" border="5" />] (if: $JeffMemories is "played with Smile Dog!")[playing with smile! <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/27/smiledog.png" alt="smiledog.png" border="5" width="300"/>] (if: $JeffMemories is "████████")[It's called "████████" for a reason??? The sketchbook doesn't explode or anything but Jeff is uncomfortable.] (if: $JeffMemories is "stepped on Smile Dog's tail and cried even though she said it was fine.")[crying over smile dog <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/23/Jeff-and-dowg.png" alt="Jeff-and-dowg.png" border="5" width="300" />] } [[Draw something else->draw]] [[Other task->get some work done.]]

{(if: $favoriteKnife is "butcher's")[A classic, heavy duty blade. Jeff typically only uses this cleaver for co-op missions. The knife's design relies on momentum to get an efficient cut. Jeff presses his thumb across the blade. [[This one time...]]] (if: $favoriteKnife is "tomato")[A tomato knife is more about fun than efficiency. The two prongs at the tip make for a unusual attack. Yeah, Jeff likes to spice things up whenever possible. What can I say, he's a silly, fun loving guy. [[This one time...]]] (if: $favoriteKnife is "carving")[Carving knives are very thin, so they don't hold up well in combat. Jeff uses a carving knife mostly for aesthetic purposes. The delicate, more precise nature of the is also useful when extracting information. [[This one time...]]] (if: it is "boning")[haha... boning... anyway... This one, Jeff has mixed feelings about. It's great for combat, as far as kitchen knives go, that is. However, Jeff is not actually a fan of processing a corpse. He's actually one of the most squeamish people in this line of work. More interested the adrenaline of the kill itself, than the gooey fallout. It's not a medative experience. This is posssibly what keeps him in check more than anything. If he was working alone, he'd always be the one having to clean up his own messes. Fuck that. [[This one time...]]] }

{(if: $favoriteKnife is "butcher's")[Jeff used this knife to mug a hiker for throat lozenges and a granola bar.] (if: $favoriteKnife is "tomato")[Jeff stole a tomato, cut it using the tomato knife, and put it on a burger and it was nice.] (if: $favoriteKnife is "carving")[EJ made Jeff help it clean up a Zalgoid husk. He hated it at first, but by the end, having learned dissection techniques from it, he only stronlgy disliked it.] (if: it is "boning")[He stabbed this knife right into the back of Mr.Widemouth's skull so hard it poked out the little dweeb's eye. Widemouth has sworn vengeance, despite having healed completely. Drama…]} [[test another blade ->Maintenance is important.]] [[Other task->get some work done.]]

Yes he does! He remebers everything that's like... EVER happened to him. Here, like that time he {(cycling-link: 2bind $JeffMemories, "spat gum on the back of Masky's jacket and it stayed there for like a whole day without Masky noticing.", "played with Smile Dog!", "████████", "stepped on Smile Dog's tail and cried even though she said it was fine.")} [[And he can draw it too!]]

{ (if: $favoriteRoomate is "Masky")[A drawing of Masky. ] (if: $favoriteRoomate is "BEN")[A drawing of BEN. ] (if: $favoriteRoomate is "Momo")[A drawing of Momo. Someone might say something silly like "Momo isn't a creepypasta!" But neither is Masky and there is no god. <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/23/Momo-posing.png" alt="Momo-posing.png" border="5" width="300" />] (if: $favoriteRoomate is "Smile Dog")[A lovely drawing of Smile! <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/21/Smile-dog-behold.png" alt="Smile-dog-behold.png" border="5" />] (if: $favoriteRoomate is "Eyeless Jack")[This drawing of Jack <img src="https://tinypic.host/images/2023/02/21/Eyeless-jack-gnawing-a-bone-full.png" alt="Eyeless jack gnawing on a bone in the forest" border="5" width="300"/>] (if: $favoriteRoomate is "Nina")[Jeff doesn't know where she came from because he hasn't read the source material but he's become fond of her. <img src="https://fieldofhate.neocities.org/fields/MEDIA/Nina-about-to-kill-me-with-a-rock.png" alt="Nina the Killer is about to throw a rock" title="Nina the Killer" border=5px width=300px>] } [[Draw someone else ->draw]] [[Other task->get some work done.]]

Jeff pulls out his beloved collection, along with a whetstone and honer. [[Maintenance is important.]]